M (snowym) wrote,
M
snowym

  • Music:
I was just eating lunch while randomly watching TV, and I was shocked by the blatant LIES.

Get this. Some kids are trying to break pieces of wood with their bare-hands, and their karate sensei refuses to let them have a break. I didn't see that their hands were broken or bleeding, so I didn't feel too sorry for them. Then one of the punk-assed kids mentions the magic word that makes the building automatically explode. Yes. Captain Crunch. So automatically, a whole wall is blown out, because that bastard, Captain Crunch, decided to dock his ship in this poor guy's karate building. All the Cap'n has is cereal. You think that pays for demolished walls? Anyway, so the kids are so happy to have ruined their sensei's business and life, yelling "Cap'n, Cap'n!" And like a saint, the karate teacher just wants to impart his gift of learning unto the children, and admonishes them for breaking his building in half, by telling them to practice more. And then my mind was blown. Captain Crunch got up on the port bow or hull or whatever part of the ship it was, and proclaims:

"I have a blackbelt in breakfast."

What? Is that even possible? And frankly, would a blackbelt in breakfast beat a blackbelt in kicking-someone's-ass? I think not. Snap his neck, sensei.

I think the kids still hopped on the damn bastard's ship or something. I don't really remember, because I was in SHOCK. Oh TV, why did you lie to me? Have you been lying to me all these years? I feel at a loss now. Blackbelt in breakfast, indeed. Don't think I won't look into this.
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