Would someone mind telling me if I sound sane at ALL? Probably not, but hopefully she can feel for me a bit at what I'm constantly, constantly, constantly worrying about lately. I'm going absolutely insane, this isn't turning out to be a pleasant experience so far -.-. Here's the letter:
(Name of the person at my college)--
Jessica and I talked about all you included in this e-mail today, and without any extra financial help, we still feel very worried about our financial situations during the student exchange. We both feel a bit cheated that it seemed we were going to be living in Gakushuin's dormitories, and then when it would be very difficult to pull out of the exchange program, we were informed that we wouldn't be able to. As it is, both me and Jessica will have to be extremely cautious about the money we spend all the time while there.
This whole situation is turning into a headache, and it's hard to be excited about the trip now that we have these worries planted on our shoulders. If I sound a bit irrational, it is extremely difficult for me to think about all of this without becoming emotional, so I'm sorry for that. It's just that there are new dorm fees (security deposit, electricity and water bills), train and/or bus ticket costs, the everyday commute to school, and the wonder of whether if I can afford all of this that I hadn't originally been planning on, and having to deal with all this while being in a new country for the first time.
It all seems very daunting and near impossible at the moment, and I hope you can understand my feelings on this. I felt I haven't talked with you much about this trip, and thought maybe you'd be interested in knowing my thoughts on things so far. If there really is no other help that can be gained from MSSU or Gakushuin, I guess me and Jessica will deal with it somehow. That's all my thoughts and worries on the exchange program at the moment.
I know there's probably nothing you can do, but it makes me feel better now that you know what we're trying to deal with. I dearly hope you don't feel offended by any of this, because not having you help us deal with Gakushuin will make it all the worse. Thank you for your help so far.
I just realized after reading that letter again, that yes, I do indeed sound like a raving lunatic. I hope that she doesn't get pissed off or anything >.>. My eyes hurt and are puffy, so I'm going to go I-don't-know-what.